Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
