i just had sex bonerless
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Randomize
