Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
