he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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