it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
