Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
