either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
It's just like the Real World with babies
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
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