Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
