you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
