I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Randomize
