i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
