More tranny stories later!
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
