Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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