I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
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My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
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You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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