i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
