Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
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I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
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Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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