We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
