quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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