fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize