Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
