Are we in a gay sports bar?
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Randomize
