I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
