i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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