we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize
