Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Randomize
