hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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