The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize