I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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