I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Are we still banned from the library?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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