i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize