Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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