I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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