I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize