idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
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