question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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