Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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