you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
