I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize