Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
