And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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