You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.