Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?