Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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