Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.