my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
why do cheetos always look like penises
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Shitshow foam night was such a success
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..