I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
the night ended with taco bell and tears
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that