Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize
