If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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