apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Randomize
