you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
