I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
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