Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
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