Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize